


In the Darkness of Winter, Light is Found

by BlackBarnOwl



Category: Nikolai Series - Leigh Bardugo, The Grisha Trilogy - Leigh Bardugo
Genre: Alarkling - Freeform, Christmas Fluff, Darklina - Freeform, F/M, Light Angst, the darkling returns
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-18
Updated: 2020-01-18
Packaged: 2021-02-19 08:07:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,044
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22307881
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlackBarnOwl/pseuds/BlackBarnOwl
Summary: Set after the events of King of Scars, Alina's friends have gathered at Keramzin for the feast of Saint Nikolai. Alina is struggling to pretend she's still in love with Mal while wanting the Darkling, who she still believes is dead. There's a dark figure in the snow beneath a tree who's going to prove otherwise.
Relationships: Mal Oretsev/Alina Starkov (past), The Darkling | Aleksander Morozova/Alina Starkov
Kudos: 67





	In the Darkness of Winter, Light is Found

**Author's Note:**

> Unedited and unbeta'ed.

The snow cascaded down in fluffy white clumps, creating mountainous drifts around Keramzin and on the windowsill. Alina sat in a large velvet armchair in the corner, knees tucked up to her chest and a mug of steaming tea tightly clasped between her hands. The mug’s warmth couldn’t warm her chilled fingers and her gaze was perpetually drawn to the dark window as her friends laughed raccously around her.

Alina wonders what Aleks would think of this celebration. She could almost hear his voice in her head, scoffin and telling her this was a waste of time when they could be training or strategizing. But of course, he wasn’t here, the war was over, and Alina was no longer the sun summoner. Her hands haven’t been warm since that fateful day when she killed Aleks and lost her Grisha status.

Mal sauntered over, the liquor in his system making him stumble, and he draped an arm around Alina’s shoulders. She did her best not to tense and hoped that her face remained neutral. She didn’t want any of the others to know anything was wrong, especially when she could see the worry and exhaustion lining their faces. Dealing with the foreign dignitaries after Nikolai’s engagement ball and the so-called “miracles” that kept popping up around Ravka must have been taking its toll. Alina didn’t need them to know that she was having doubts. She had thought Mal was what she wanted, who she was supposed to be with, but… as the months had worn on, Alina had realized that it was nothing but residual childhood affection and that there was someone else she wanted.

“We should go outside,” Alina suggested, sliding out from underneath Mal’s arm. Mal opened his mouth to protest and complain, but Alina was already buttoning up her coat, and the others quickly followed suit. 

The cold stole her breath away as Alina stepped outside and her breath bloomed in a puff of fog. Her friends poured out of the house and before long, Nikolai threw the first snowball. It hit Zoya square in the face and sparked a war. It was Nikolai and the twins against the Grisha Triumvirate. Mal had opted to stay inside, and Alina wandered through the winter wonderland, unable to stop her eyes from scanning the dark. She knew it was hopeless, but she couldn’t break the habit of looking for him in the dark corners of rooms. 

Her eyes nearly glossed over it, but the shadowy outline of a figure was barely visible beneath the giant oak a little ways out. Alina’s heart soared even as she chided herself for even hoping. Alina cautiously meandered towards the tree, ensuring that none of her friends were paying attention. Blending into the shadows beneath the tree, was Aleksander. Alina’s heart caught in her chest as she sank to her knees. It couldn’t be possible. He was dead, she’d killed him, felt his life blood soak onto her hands, staining them forever. He couldn’t be here.

“Hello, my Alina,” he greeted, the words a quiet rumble. It shouldn’t be possible, but he seemed so… real. Alina smiled for the first time that night, and she was glad the cold disguised her rising blush.

“You shouldn’t be here, Aleksander,” Alina warned, placing a tentative hand on his shoulder. He didn’t disappear or fade away, and he felt solid. She loosed the breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding. Aleksander tensed momentarily when she touched him, but relaxed when she drew even closer.

“There is nowhere else I should be, solnishka.”

“I’m not solnishka anymore, Aleksander. I’m no longer the sun summoner. Besides, why aren’t enraged with me? I killed you,” Alina pointed out. Aleksander snaked out an arm and pulled her close. Alina froze in shock, but gave into the desire to nestle against his side. She didn’t know how long this illusion would last, and his warmth was a welcome barrier against the cold. He wrapped his arm tightly around her, further securing Alina to his side, and unlike with Mal, Alina found herself relaxing. Despite the overwhelming guilt and paranoia she felt, she couldn’t think of anywhere she’d rather be.

“How are you back, Aleks?”

“Sobachka didn’t tell you?” he mocked. “He and Zoya pulled me out of alternate dimension tied to the shadow fold.”

Alina was torn between the guilty relief at Aleksander’s survival, and the rising anger that her friends hadn’t told her something so important.

“Then why aren’t you imprisoned?”

Aleksander sighed. “I am, Alina. You can figure it out.”

“That’s not possible!” Alina gasped. “The bond was severed when I lost my powers and you died!”

“I think, if you dig deep enough, you’ll find it’s not the only thing that has returned, Sankta Alina. You must return to your friends, they’ll start to wonder where you are.”

Alina didn’t want to heed the truth of his statement. She wanted to stay here in his arms forever and pretend like they were normal people, figuring out their feelings. Not a dead saint and a dead tyrant. However, she could already hear her friends starting to call her name. She would make them take her back to Os Alta, and she would figure things out with the Darkling in person. After all, if the public found out that the dreaded Darkling had returned, what better time than to make an appearance? Especially if Aleksander’s cryptic statement turned out to hold the truth she hoped it did. Alina smiled woefully at Aleksander and he kissed her forehead before fading away.

“Alina! There you are!” Nikolai shouted. Alina stood up and dusted the snow off of her clothes.

“I want to return to Os Alta with you,” Alina announced.

“Are you sure that’s a wise idea, Alina?” Zoya sked.

“I’m positive. Nothing you say can dissuade me,” Alina stated firmly. Her friends shared a loaded look between themselves, and Alina knew they were contemplating telling her the Darkling had returned. They stayed silent and accepted Alina’s grim determination to return to Os Alta. She was one of the last players to return to the palace. They just had to hope things would turn out better than the last time they were all in the palace together.


End file.
